I am, to be sure, a Kinsey 5. So what does it mean if you are a woman who likes men but finds other women sexually arousing? Many women look at other women and feel a bond that is both physical and emotional. Madonna, who says that she is bisexual, told one interviewer that she has had a lot of crushes on women but has only been in love with men. But as a femme top who loves to rock a cock, I immediately noticed that there was nary a strap-on in sight. Blindfold a dude, tie him up, and make out with his gorgeous wife? One of the only women with what I can only describe as dyke energy, I secretly hoped that she was an out and proud queer, cruising the crowd of married women for some no-strings-attached action. The stakes were lower than approaching a woman in a gay bar or at a queer party. You could almost hear the panties drop.
Better workday than sitting behind a desk. Women had filled the space, grinding on each other, going down on each other, fucking with abandon. To undress her, tie her up, and spank her. The stakes were lower than approaching a woman in a gay bar or at a queer party. One woman went into detail about her recent break-up, after she discovered her famous boyfriend was cheating: But connected to the arousal by "femininity" is the idea of identification. And what did they think of my sex? The room, a dark and low-lit, red and black adorned loft space turned high-end dungeon, was packed with scantily clad women dressed to impress. I was shocked, even thrilled, to see sex happening and women coming, but I had to wonder: I instructed Chloe to keep her eyes closed. As a queer woman in that space, albeit also white and femme, I felt like I was in hetero territory, no matter how many times women approached me to play. We were the only couple in the room save for two women making out in the entrance, perhaps hoping someone would trip over them and decide to stay. As I watched, an eager brunette spun and the uncorked remains of the bottle that got everyone onto the floor in the first place. So what does it mean if you are a woman who likes men but finds other women sexually arousing? A queer space lends itself to openness to different expressions, however successful that is in practice, and this space was gendered in monochrome. Others claimed curiosity, plain and simple. Was it sexual socialization in the swinger scene, or were they so eager to find intimacy with another woman that they would fuck anywhere? Yet it seems that the issue of sexual arousal by other women among straight women is far more common than you might have suspected. But neither does femme invisibility, sort of: It was lesbian, but not too lesbian. When it was over, we were both talking about how much we liked watching Emma Stone. But here we were, hired lesbians at the straight girl party like foxes in the hen house, and after our scene we took the chance to explore. At its core, even our queer culture figures sex between feminine-presenting women as performative. But I secretly hope to get an email one day recounting that seeing me and my girlfriend at Skirt Club inspired an opening of the closet door. The group squealed at the closed-mouth encounter like a drunken bachelorette party.
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